Perhaps no one has ever told us that marriage is an art—an art that must be learned.
Most couples’ problems do not stem from ill will or bad intentions, but from a lack of understanding of this vital art. Below are some key principles for building a healthy and flourishing relationship. Of course, mastering these skills requires study, counselling, and practice.
1. Pay attention to your partner. Practice active listening. Active listening involves a genuine interest in understanding, asking questions, avoiding assumptions, and ensuring mutual understanding.
2. Understand your partner’s situation. View the world from their perspective: What is their history? What are their needs? What pressures are they facing?
3. At the beginning of your life together, clarify and agree upon boundaries, expectations, and responsibilities. If you haven’t done this yet, it’s not too late.
4. Have expectations of your partner based on their own abilities and circumstances, not in comparison to others’ capacities or successes.
5. Understanding, engaging, and working on the relationship is an opportunity for you to grow wiser and stronger.
6. A healthy and thriving relationship requires awareness and education. Make study, counselling, and continuous learning a part of your life.
7. The day you entered your partner’s life, a new seedling sprouted in their heart. That seedling belongs to you. Everything you offer your partner is nourishment for your own seedling. Care for it—its shade, fruits, and blossoms will be yours.
